This weekend was full of music – I had the Flaming Lips show on Friday and that Spygirl + International Pop Overthrow Festival thing on Saturday. Before I get to the reviews, though, I want to talk to you – dear readers – about concert etiquette. I feel like it’s something I shouldn’t have to point out, but after the antics of a few concert-goers this weekend, I’ve realized that maybe some folks need a little reminder about how to be a good concert buddy.
The point of a concert is for everyone to flock to a venue to rock the fuck out to their favorite band. Now, I understand that some people’s version of “rock the fuck out” is different than yours, but take a cue from the girl standing in front of you or the guy standing next to you. If they are not mosh-pit thrashing, but instead bopping along to the music, you probably shouldn’t be thrashing and throwing elbows. SO to the tiny Asian girl who kept jumping on my heels at the Lips show – this means you. You were exhibiting poor concert etiquette.
Along the same vein – I want to make a shout out to the obviously trashed guy. Dude, how on earth can you enjoy a good concert when you’re wasted? Being wasted at a concert is a giant waste of your money and our time. I could do without you elbowing me on the top of the cranium and at that point, you could do with about 4-5 hours of really decent sleep. When you’re so wasted at a concert that you can’t keep your balance, you’re in danger of hurting someone around you and you’re probably not going to remember the giant confetti balloons, or elbowing me on the top of the head the SECOND time. If you can’t stand up straight, like a normal person, you probably need to get to the back and sit down. It’ll keep you from vomiting down someone’s back too! While you’re at it, keep an eye on your elbows; if you elbow someone, you are asking for a fight and I don’t want to be the one to have to knock you out because you elbowed my friend in the face. I can understand a bubbly drunk… But if you can’t remember what song the band just sang, go sit down and get a hold of yourself.
OH! And sweaty, drunk, no-shirt-guy? You’re just as bad. Put your shirt back on because I don’t need your body sweat all over my bare arms.
Good concert etiquette is knowing the appropriate time to mosh or to crowd surf. It’s being respectful of others’ personal space. If you’re a “shorty” and you can’t see and you feel like you’d die if you didn’t, go ahead and ask the person in front of you NICELY, instead of jumping all over them to try to budge them out of the way. You have no idea how many taller people are totally okay with you standing in front of them because you’re so short, they have NO problem seeing over you. Pushing into people to get them to move doesn’t work when you’re driving around in your car, it rarely works in line at the DMV, so what makes you think it’s any better at a concert?   And if you’re jumping to see over me, stop it. I’ll make room for you if you’re shorter than me. Sadly, your tall boyfriend can stand back there – but if you’re shorter than I am, you don’t need to jump all over the place to see over me, because generally you’re that jumping girl that’s stomping on my heels and I sort of want to choke you.
- Image via Austinist.com
For the moshers out there – I know who you are, and I can tell if you’re experienced. When you’re in the mosh pit, everyone is moshing and everyone in a good pit keeps an eye out. Nobody gets punched in the face; if someone falls, your main goal is to get them up off the ground so nobody gets hurt. I’ve seen limbs stepped on and people have had to be carried out by friends when the pit got too rough. Just think – what would happen if you got pushed hard enough to hit the ground? You don’t want your ankle busted because some asshole stomped on you instead of helping you get up off the ground. Nobody is out to hurt each other and nobody moshes for the sake of moshing – it’s really about the music. If the band is playing a slower jam, chill out and catch your breath.
(For bonus reading on Mosh Pits, go here!)
If you’re in a crowd with drinks, keep your drink down, instead of above the short chick’s head. I’ve worn so many people’s drinks that I feel this one needs to be restated. I’d rather have your beer on my shoes (I wear my Chucks specifically for concerts, for that reason because I can hose them off later) than in my hair. If your drink is super full, you need to drink some off the top before pushing your way through the crowd.
About crowd surfing – if you’re crowd surfing in a skirt, you’re going to get a finger to the bum. It probably won’t be on purpose, but if you’re crowd surfing in a skirt, you’re doin’ it wrong. The same goes for people who wear boots to crowd surf. I could see if they were soft cotton, but big old hard boots suck when someone’s crowd surfing and they catch you in the face. I know a few taller guys who’ve caught a Doc to the face. It’s about as fun as you can imagine.
There will always be some lech out there grabbing ass in a crowd, so keep an eye out for each other. Don’t let each other get too drunk or get lost at a festival show (like Sasquatch – apparently some guy got separated from his friends and locked in a port-a-potty). Keep each other hydrated and if your friend is getting too rowdy, tell them to chill out.
As with anywhere, if you wouldn’t do it in an open and public place, don’t do it at a concert – includes spitting on people, throwing gum at people or whipping out your unmentionables. Don’t ruin the fun for everyone by being a douche.
If you can think of anything I forgot, leave us a comment!
You know, it really amazes me how different mosh pits are at different genres of shows. I had some friends who were hardcore into metal and would say that the mosh pit was literally just an excuse to push people around and that you’d better not fall down, because you’d break bones. Whereas, at punk concerts it’s more about having fun, and if someone falls down they’re right back up immediately, helped by someone else. Or that’s how it’s supposed to be, and generally if people not in the “scene” who don’t know how it works show up and think it’s just an excuse to kick the shit out of people, they get taught a lesson fast.
Also, in the realm of etiquette: don’t stand by the mosh pit and then bitch about getting bumped into. Seriously. Don’t be that guy (or girl!). I was at a show once and a guy pulled brass knuckles out because of this. If you don’t want to get bumped into, DON’T STAND BY THE PIT.
Just generally try not to invade other peoples’ space, as much as possible. My friends and I were at a Streetlight Manifesto show a few years ago and this girl tried shoving us out of her way to get closer; then when we stood our ground, stood behind us and started grabbing my shoulders and jumping (while putting her weight on them) to try and see better. Seriously? She was way taller than me too!
Anyways, rants done. Good list, Birdie!
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That’s what the short chick did too! I had scrapes from her sneakers down the backs of my legs after the show, from her jumping almost on top of me. URG!